Self Confidence

One need not be concerned much if his health deteriorates. By consulting the right doctor and undergoing appropriate treatment his health is restored. But, if the mental strength of a person weakens it is not regained as easily. Therefore, at no point of time should the mental strength and self-confidence of a person be shaken. If the mental strength is damaged it cannot be earned back. Parents desire the well being of their children. They desire that their children  do well in their studies and occupy high offices. But, when the son or the daughter informs them, “I am going to check my examination result that is being declared today,” some parents scoff at their children, “Ha! Going to check your result? Well! You would certainly have failed. Is there any need for going over to learn this result of yours?”

Moreover, parents compare their children with their relatives’ children and accuse them of not doing as well in their studies. Their words become detrimental to the progress of the very same children whom they desire to do well in life. By always uttering such discouraging words they destroy their self confidence and mental strength. If this continues, the son/daughter begins to think, ‘my intellect is low. It is not within my ability to accomplish this.’

Further, they request others to offer advice to their children. This attitude is held not only towards children but is found to exist between elders, too. Once a person is thus affected mentally it is difficult for the affected person to progress in life. Therefore, we should speak only healthy, encouraging words to those whom we wish well.

In the Mahabhãrata, we find the great character of Karna. There is none to equal him in valour, competence and astuteness to fight on the battle field. Several times, Dharmaputra runs away from him on the battle field. The whole Pandava army shivers out of fear of Karna. Several reasons are attributed for the defeat of such great Karna. One of them is that it was due to the curse of Parasurama from whom Karna had learnt the art of the use of arrows. Parasurama, a Kshatriya hater, taught only the Brahmins. Karna bluffed about his caste and learnt the art from him. On learning about the deceit, Parasurama had cursed that the ‘Brahmãstra vidya’ that he had taught him will not come of use to him on the battle field. Another reason pointed out is that Karna had inadvertently beaten a calf being adoringly brought up by a Maharshi and the latter had cursed him that on the battle field his chariot would sink in the soil. Though these two reasons are popularly attributed to Karna’s defeat, there is yet another important reason behind it. Karna’s ability cannot be underestimated. He had the ability to win in spite of such hurdles. So, what then was the reason behind his defeat?

Karna is ready to leave for the battle field. Generally, it is the practice for the one for whom the war is being fought to offer words of encouragement to his army. Thus, Duryodana calls Karna and offers words of encouragement, “Karna! I know you very well. You are a great warrior. Bhima, Arjuna and Dharmaputra tremble on seeing you. You are my pride. Victory is certain for you.”

Karna tells Duryodana, “I am certainly very happy to hear you speak thus. I will either kill Arjuna or attain martyrdom. If Arjuna is killed the Pandava army will flee from the battlefield.”

Karna then continued, “However, the one who goes onto the battlefield should also ponder over the strength of the enemy. Only then can he decide the way to fight him.”

Duryodana sent Karna to the battlefield saying, “Karna! You are in no way lower than Arjuna. Go boldly.”

Karna spoke after much thought, “Duryodana! You have spoken well. Arjuna will be defeated at my hands. Yet, we should not overlook certain matters. All opine that Arjuna’s bow ‘Khãndiba’ is greater than my bow. In reality, my bow is indeed greater than his ‘Khãndiba’. But, the string on his bow is divine. Further, his quiver never gets empty. Even as arrows are removed from it, it gets filled up. His chariot has been given to him by Agni deva. It is a very special chariot. To top it all, do you know who his charioteer is? Verily Sri Krishna Paramãtma! Who can stand before the divinity of Sri Krishna?

Therefore, I would defeat Arjuna if he were alone. The divine bow, a quiver that never goes empty, Agni deva’s chariot, the charioteer Sri Krishna – with all these Arjuna becomes strong. If it were an individual war between me and Arjuna, victory is certainly mine. There is no iota of doubt in it. But, I am thinking of the above mentioned matters.”

Duryodana asked, “What should I do?”

Karna said to Duryodana, “Shaliya in our army is equal to Sri Krishna in charioting. If, he would drive my chariot, I will win Arjuna easily.”

Duryodana thought over the words of Karna. He felt that Karna was quite right. He decided, ‘we should not underestimate the strength of the enemy. I must somehow convince Shaliya to drive the chariot for Karna.’ He met Shaliya personally. As soon as he told the whole matter, Shaliya seethed with anger.

Shaliya cursed Duryodana, “I am a king. A Kshatriya. Karna is the son of a charioteer. How will I drive the chariot for Karna? How dare you suggest this to me? Just because I have come to help you, can you dare to talk to me in this manner?”

Duryodana did not lose his temper on hearing Shaliya. He was very smart. Realising that his plans would be upset if he were to be angry with Shaliya, he began to praise Shaliya in various ways.

“Shaliya! You are a great warrior. None can equal you – neither Bhima, nor Arjuna, not even Karna. Only Krishna equals you.”

Is there anyone who does not fall for praises? Shaliya’s anger was soothed. On hearing the praise that he was equal to Krishna he agreed to drive the chariot for Karna. But, Shaliya placed a condition – “I have given my word to Dharmaputra that if I were to drive the chariot for Karna on the battle field, I would insult and abuse Karna in various ways. I would behave so.”

Duryodana was aghast. He just could not understand this.Lets see why Shaliya spoke as he did.

Shaliya came with the army only with the idea of helping the Pandavas. En route, he found that a big dinner was being hosted for all. Mistaking the host to be Dharmaputra, Shaliya participated in the dinner. It was actually being hosted by Duryodana. Shaliya could not take the side of the Pandavas after learning about this. He felt that it was not proper to fight against the one who had offered food and, so, he decided to help Duryodana.

Later, Shaliya confided the whole matter to Dharmaputra. Dharmaputra’s efforts to convince Shaliya otherwise went in vain. Shaliya refused to change his decision. Dharmaputra was thoroughly frightened by this, for, he was well aware of Shaliya’s competence in driving a chariot. He also knew that Duryodana would use it for Karna. Dharmaputra, therefore, extracted a promise from Shaliya.

“Shaliya! If you happen to drive the chariot for Karna, you should, in various ways, speak insulting, abusive, discouraging words to Karna and weaken his mental strength.”

Shaliya promised to do so.

In spite of Shaliya openly speaking about this to Duryodana, the latter sent him to drive the chariot for Karna. What happened on the battle field? Oh! Pitiable Karna!

Sitting on the chariot, Karna said to Shaliya, “Shaliya! Drive my chariot in front of Arjuna’s chariot. Today, victory is mine. Just watch the Pandava army going to pieces.”

Shaliya said, at once, “Karna! Don’t utter empty words! Just as the cat hides itself on seeing the elephant, you shall shiver down your spine and hide on seeing Arjuna. You are the son of a charioteer whereas I am a Kshatriya. I belong to the royal family. I have been pushed to the position of driving for you. Don’t talk about your bravery to me.”

Whenever the opportunity arose, Shaliya uttered discouraging, slighting words to Karna; he thus shattered Karna’s mental strength and competence. This was the reason for the downfall of Karna.

What do we learn from this? Mental strength is more important than physical strength. One who has lost his confidence and mental strength is verily dead! Our ancestors who were well aware of this have shown this in Mahabharata. However capable a person be, if one repeatedly speaks discouraging words, pointing only to his mistakes, his mind suffers. Knowing that such a one falls down easily, Shaliya spoke thus to Karna.

It is, therefore, good to keep ourselves away from those who always point only to our mistakes and failures; because, their company will affect us adversely. We should never speak/listen to discouraging words. We should speak only good things. We should listen only to good things. We should lead our life with the confidence that whatever God does is only for good.

NOTE: Any discrepancy/lapse in the translated version of the Upanyasam/writings is the sole responsibility of the person/s who translated the work from Tamizh into English.

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